We don't sit around and talk. We sit around and view.
Most folks bring food to reunions but not us, we bring pictures Always there are pictures.
In the old days when there were slide projectors, my dad, aunt and uncle would bring carousels and carousels of images. After dinner (really the best time for kids to play) we were all expected to sit and watch what seemed to be endless slides and listen to someone drone on about their vacation.
Images flashed before us hypnotically on the wall. And there we'd sit, lined up along the couch, like birds on a wire enduring the winter, and pinch ourselves to stay awake while my uncle droned on about a recent foreign trip.
Just about the time we'd nod off he'd say:
"Oh, and here's the best part, pay attention here...." and then tell us the number of gallons a camel drinks.
And you could never tell when the show would end because he'd hide the stacks of carousels under the table. You only thought there were 80 slides. But as soon as the last one went black he'd pull another carousel out and slap it on the projector before you had a chance to go to the bathroom.
Since the clan has grown and slideshows have gone digital the Reunion Slideshows we must endure has mushroomed. Last night we watched five slideshows! And they were NOT short. Yeah, it's easy to show pics now. Dump the digitals into the slideshow program and generate a DVD. But like Goldblum said in Jurassic Park: "Just because you can do it, doesn't mean you should."
After what seemed like 400 pictures from one of the shows, someone said to my uncle:
"Hey, uncle Rich, slideshows are supposed to have a beginning AND an end."
He started to laugh hysterically.
Someone else said: "My watch has stopped."
And then another said: "Forget the watch, check the calendar!"
He put his hand up to stop the ribbing. His gut was splitting.
And so all 25 of us sat, watching our lives flash before our eyes.
It was death by slideshow.
"Here we are watching a slideshow AGAIN." - dave terry (corrupted line from Jurassic Park)
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